Wednesday, December 07, 2011

Seizure The Day

K had a seizure on Monday (she hadn’t had one since sometime around Labor Day). She’s been home from school since then because of headaches. She was going to go back to school today, but at the doctor’s office yesterday, she had a temperature—so home again.

This post by Rachelle Gardner got me thinking about my priorities and how I “triage” not only my writing life, but my life in general. For me, my family/kids have always come first (though housework isn’t considered family—hee hee hee). I drop everything to take care of them.

This has never been an issue for me, but I can’t help wondering if there will be a day when it is. What happens if I have a deadline I need to make? Will I be able to drop it and let my family come first? I’d like to think I’d find a way to do both, but—especially in K’s case—I’m not sure it will be possible. It’s not that she needs my undivided attention after she has a seizure (she usually sleeps for several hours), but I can’t concentrate and feel the need to check on her every five minutes or so to make sure she’s not seizing again or having any problems.

Monday I tried to force myself to write, but I just couldn’t. I was able to write on Tuesday so I guess that made up for the lack of writing on Monday. Had K not stayed home on Tuesday, I wouldn’t have been able to do any writing because I volunteer at the kids’ school library all day Tuesday and on Thursday mornings. That would have put my only full writing day this week on Friday (the kids have half days today and tomorrow for teacher in-service). Were I on a deadline with a novel, this could pose a problem.

The thing is, in my “triage” I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to prioritize my writing above my kids/family. They will always come first. That doesn’t mean I’ll blow off a deadline to go on a field trip with the kids or something like that (depends on how important it is to the child in question), but the really important things—where they need me will always come first. If that makes me a bad writer, I’m okay with that. I believe in God and an afterlife where families can be together forever. My writing isn’t going to get me a place in the eternities, but the relationship with my family will.  I’d rather be a bad writer if it makes me a better mother.

Do you ever have days when no matter how much you want to write and have the means and time to write, you just can’t bring yourself to do it? If so, do you fight it and get some writing done anyway or do you just let it go? How do you triage your writing life/real life?

Write Triage on!

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1 comment:

Bethany C. said...

Oh, boy. YES! Today is one of those days. 9 year old daughter had to have two teeth pulled (YIKES!) I was desperate to write--my brain hamster is on a roll right now, but just couldn't concentrate--couldn't do it. I'm finding when my kiddos are home--writing won't happen.

When the deadline days come--you'll figure it out. Until then, just keep doing the best you can. The kiddos always come first--and somehow, the deadlines will be met.